Ahhhhhhh, Christmas. Yuletide to our European ancestors. Hanukkah to our Jewish ones. Kwanza to our African compatriots. Kicking Day to our Asian brethren. You see?! We CAN be kind! We're practically philanthropists. Oh, by the way, Steve Ferguson, yeah you, the one who used to make fun of our slip-on shoes and steal our homework in math, we heard that your wife left you for Greasy Gill (didn't he used to eat his dandruff in highschool?). Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! Merry Christmas. In light of the holiday spirit lets talk about The Real Ebenezer Scrooge.
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